AnShi 10th May 2014 Part 1

[coolohoh]

Ok, so I know many people would like me to review AnShi, so here’s an AnShi episode for all of you! The previous episode of AnShi is really funny too, but someone has subbed it already… so if you want do watch it, do join the comm! (Oh wow, it’s a new subbing comm, i should sign up too :P)

Honestly I was worried after the AnShi revamp at first, because I was worried that the staff might be running out of ideas for the show, and that it may be going down the road of HnA (you know how at the end they were coming out with all sorts of new segments to try and revive the show, but to be nothing but the share house segment really worked). But I guess i was wrong! From the snowboarding to the massage… it seems to be getting more and more exciting each week! Saw the preview of this week’s episode and it’s a must watch. Though I must say… poor Ohno! A word of warning though, i probably won’t be able to translate a lot of the scolding bit so… >< gomen in advance!

First we start off with the ‘Things that Arashi does not know - World investigation’ segment. Gosh. i hope that title translation is ok… It’s the forth time they did this now. The first time it was on the topic of share house, then there was the one person karaoke and dieting/fasting. Let’s see what the topic today is!

Almost everyone is wearing suits today!

J: Are you guys in the same job?
The 35 guests nods. Arashi is trying to guess what’s todays topic.
S: So its not about some hobby… The topic is out! People in the same generation (age group) as Arashi, doing the job of high school teachers! Lol Aiba’s mouth is opened soooo wide!

All of them are surprised!

Sho immediately comments on Nino’s drama, where he’s acting as a high school teacher. N: Ah so its like that?

14 out of the 35 are in their 30s.

Of course, that leaves the remaining 21 people to be in their twenties. 

Sho starts spinning around in his chair while calling out specific ages. 1 24 year old. 

This guy is 24 (that’s my age!) and the youngest of the lot. 

He’s been teaching for 3 years already. He became a teacher because rather than performing well himself, he would rather help others perform well (something like that. its not a dictionary perfect translation)

He likes it most when students who aren’t so close to him, and a bit rebellious… when they graduated and then open up to him, he likes that the most. S: Its like a drama!

This English teacher decided to teach because of GTO (Great Teach Onizuka) and gokusen (Jun acted in the season 1 drama)

no. 18 thought Kawato sensei in the drama Rookies was great, he was a teacher who did not act like a teacher, but rather he stood on the same level as the students, and he wanted to become someone like that too.

A: But for teachers all that exists in your head is the students right *teachers nods*
A: You have no choice but to keep thinking about their well being right? *more nods*
A: that’s so difficult! J: Your ending point is actually really simple!

Sho asks the teachers what they do on their days off. 

Teacher No. 1 spends his off days with the students. He was asked by the students to join their band, and they performed in the live house (live club) together. He’s the guy with the green label in the picture. 

This guy says that there will always be some students who want to go outing somewhere (like disney land) with him. Its like he’s going on a date with the girls. Sho asks him about his love life, and he dated a junior in his university. The girl is a primary school teacher now, so they both have the same job. 

The topic then turns to love partners in the same school. 

This guy just got married a few days ago and shows off his wedding ring. 

S: Woahohohoho *laughs*
 Anyway, he’s married to another teacher from the same school!
Arashi asks if the students knew when they were dating. No. 4 jumps up to answer for him “They knew! He thought they didn’t know though!”
Aiba: Ah, you guys are from the same school? moving on… no. 22 represented Japan in the 2000 Sydney olmypics! 

Arashi: EH!

He took part in the 400m sprint. He wanted to share with teens his experience, hence he decided that being a coach in secondary school or high school is the best. 

Next on random topics within the teaching community… No. 11 shares: In front of the students you always call other teachers XX-sensei. So during off days when i meet my friends, i end up calling ‘yo! XX-sensei’ as well

This draws a bunch of laughter. J: Serious? 
No. 1 comments that it’s a small world. Like he’d meet a girl outside and it turns out that she’s the sister of his student, and during some school activity the sister appears in school and great him, making the situations pretty awkward for the teacher.

All too soon its time to end and conclude the investigation.  Sho asks Nino to make the conclusion for the segment. N: Occasionally there’s olympic athletes!
S: considering that there’s 1 is just these few, looking at all the teachers in Japan as a whole there are probably more ne?
N: Occasionally ne, occasionally.  Now we move on to the next segment…! The opening is kind of different today ne?

They wonder about the strange set. S: today’s guest will not let you feel excited/nervous.

The guest is an actress know for her scenes of scolding people in dramas!

They burst out in bittersweet laughter after watching scenes of her scolding in the drama. 
N: If i was the guest, I’d definitely not appear on this show though… A: They called her the Nation’s bully sister!

Today’s guest is Kimura Midoriko-san! (KM for short I guess)

Sho asks KM for her thoughts on the drama Gochisou-san (they showed the scary clips of her from that drama earlier). KM says that for a while, her friends stayed out of the way, no one mailed her and no one wanted to meet up with her.  They ask her who she feels like bullying in Arashi… she picks Ohno!

hahaha… poor Ohchan!

Needless to say the rest are relieved its not them. 

O: Thanks for your hard work *tries to leave the studio*
Of course they won’t let him just leave like that though :P The reason KM chose Ohno? She wants to see his tears!
J: You’ll make him cry?
 Anyhow, today’s topic will be Arashi trying out a role that will make the audience hate them!

The red curtain opens to reveal the set. 

It’s a set of the producing room? Ok I have no idea what that’s called. 

The audience screams when Masu turns around. He’ll be the MC today. I guess its nice to see a friendly face after all those scary VTRs… 

They will be learning how to act as a producer from hell!

The three rules are back…! Its been a while since we last saw these… 1st learning point! Do not bully with your mouth, bully with your eyes!

She tells arashi to focus all their energy in their eyes. They need to feel as if they want to kill people. 

Ohno makes his ‘I want to kill people’ face :P, which sends KM into a laughing fit

KM: Kawaii! 
LOL! Learning point no. 2! Hate the other party for real!
It won’t do if they are just having fun like Ohno was with Sho, they have to hate the other party for real for the acting to be convincing! And the last learning point! Kill your own charm!
KM asks Arashi to get rid of all their strong points, like being cute for example. They cannot use any of these to appeal to the audience! KM picks Ohno to be the bullied person for her exhibition bullying scene!

Ohno will be acting as the AD. 

KM will be the evil producer, bullying Ohno the AD.

Here we go! Right from the start when Masu is still introducing the skit, KM is already in the role!

In comes Ohno!
O: Excuse me
KM: Do you know what’s wrong?
O: Erm, the mistake with the bento number at the location filming earlier? 

KM: Then why did you make that mistake!
O: I’m sorry
KM: I can’t hear
O: I’m very sorry
KM: Huh?
O: I’m really sorry (louder)
KM: Your tension is really bad, so flippant, its not reaching me at all! If you want to apologise, do it properly! Ah this is really hard to translate… she pretends to venice to Ohno for a while, then immediately turns around and starts scolding him again!

Scary scary scary! 

The end. Ok, that was a very bad job reviewing ne… >< 

Poor leader! No matter how KM apologises it can’t heal the abuse he received!

S: Ohno-san how was it?
O: I want to go home…  Arashi: *laughs*

Next up is Arashi’s turn. They all protest that they can’t do it, whereas KM is really excited to see Arashi act XD

Basically, the four of them will act as the evil producer. At then end, they will say ‘you can go home. you’ve worked hard’ to indicate the end of the skit. 

the 100 arashi fans in will be the judge!

They will pass if more than 80 of them presses the button to indicate that they don’t like arashi anymore. 

MC: The person who gets the lowest score will win!
N: What? You mean in this 1 hour the person who gets disliked the most wins?
KM bends over in laughter.  S: On the other hand that means that Ohno-san will get bullied continuously by the four of us!

Trollolol!

I think he’s gonna cry already. 

A: Ohno-san forever?
O: Its ok, i’ll be drinking alone today.  It causes the rest to burst out in laughter. 

It’s their old system of janken to decide who goes first. The loser will go first!

Jun celebrates winning and not having to go first… 

Aiba and Sho plays again… Sho loses and will go first! Aiba second

First batter, Sakurai Sho!

The other three study the set… 

Nino complains that they have very few items (props) to work with

J: How am I suppose to use this?
Hahaha XD 

LOL KM is so excited to see Arashi scold people XD She’s constantly laughing and clapping all the way! :P

S: What should I do!
S: So scary!
A: So nostalgic, this feeling (they havent felt so nervous since before the AnShi revamp I guess. Today’s segment is pretty like how AnShi was before the revamp) 
S: This is bad, this is bad! *pacing around* S: Yabai yo! *still pacing around the table*

He finally settles down in the chair and the skit begins!

Sho starts with a face that reminds me of his Kazoku game role. S: I didn’t realise you’re here at all. 

Ohno starts apologising about his mistake in an event earlier. S: it went terribly didn’t it?
Sho is still laughing now… i wonder how he’s gonna proceed…
S: And what else?
O: And then i didn’t go for a bath in roughly one week…  
S: Yeah that that that 

O: I was busy, sorry about that
S: You stink
S: You can go home…
O: eh no…
S: No its better if you go home and take a bath, you stink! Sho backs away from Ohno. 

T.T I give up… i need subs T.T
Something about Sho asking Ohno to go to the location shoot by himself, but O says he can’t do it.  

The skit ends just like that… Sho starts spinning around on the chair. 
That was quite a bad performance… not scary at all! As a Yama pair lover I’d put it down to the fact that Sho mama can’t bear to scold his beloved Oh-chan :P

S: hhhaaaa...

Haha, he knows he screwed it too :P

A: EH? Who’s the one who’s downcast right now?

Sho commented that he tried to use the scripts as props, but after using it he had no idea how to continue and end the skit. 

KM comments: it good that he keep asking in a very gentle way, it makes it scary, but it’ll be good if at the end he suddenly threw something, that will make it really scary

Exactly my sentiments! I though Sho was going to throw the whole stack of scripts at Ohno/the floor but he didn’t…  S: Ah…. I couldn’t bring myself to do that...

Sho’s impression meter dropped to 55! Not a lot… :P 

He doesn’t look too pleased with his own performance :P

J: Leader how was it?
O: Hmm what was it… I was kind of shocked though.  O: Stinks!
N: That’s the story line!
O: Yes i understand that but…  Next up is Aiba!

Aiba picks up the bento and examines it XD
A: Bento! He smiles and slaps the bento on the table and starts opening it.
N: *loudly* you’re going to eat it? Hahaha, Aiba-chan is always hungry remember? (Well at least we know he eats a lot)

KM claps her hands in delight: Fantastic!

Skit starts!

The scolding starts the moment Ohno enters the set. O: Shitsureishimasu
A: You’re late baka!
O: Sorry I’m late A: Do it again do it again
O: ?
 A: Say sorry for being late when entering. Not shitsureishimasu baka! 
Shitsureishimasu is said when entering rooms, kind of like excuse me/sorry for disturbing.  Wild Aiba appears? Look at his leg :P

Ohno enters again… saying the right thing this time. A: Un, that’s ok.  
He’s eating the bento (after having asserted that the bento is real food and earlier :P) A: Are you hungry?
O: Eh me?
A: *takes a piece of karage and puts it on the table* There eat.
Woah mean mean mean! That was a great one Aiba! Haha Sho’s reaction… 

O: Ah… ah…
A: Oh chopsticks? *takes a pair of chopsticks* There you go.  A: Hurry up, eat it!

A: Hurry up and pick it up!
AIba then picks up two pens and before dropping it on the table, indicating that Ohno is supposed to use those two pens as chopsticks. 

O: Sorry…
Ohno picks up the pens…  But Aiba suddenly picks up the chicken and eat it himself! A: Its ok i’ll eat it myself!
Ahhh… I was wondering how he’d end it, if he’ll really make leader eat the chicken but yasashi Aiba decides to eat it himself instead :P Aiba chewing on the chicken. Meanwhile KM is covering her mouth so that she won’t laugh out loud XD

Unsure of what to do, Ohno hastily returns the pen to the table. 

Aiba then taps the table and scolds Ohno, asking him to wipe the table. Ohhh this is getting really interesting!

Aiba then starts questing Ohno what’s in his bag. With a muffled voice because of the piece of chicken (or whatever meat, i just assume its chicken) in his mouth :P

A: Your bag is not an accessory!
KM is bent over in silent laughter. The cut scenes are always too short for me to pause and take good screenshots…  O starts unzipping and checking his bag.
A: That’s enough! 

A: Enough, i’ll just wipe it with my hand. 

O tries to wipe it for A, but it just makes A angry. 

A: So, what did you come here for?

Ok, sorry for the very bad cut off timing. But I'm afraid I'm reaching LJ’s word limit… please head over to Part 2!